like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
We were destined to go to rehab together
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
