at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize