her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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