About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
our cab driver is having phone sex.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
