I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize