i can't believe i had my finger in that
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
