the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize