I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
It's just like the Real World with babies
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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