no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
