I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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