**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Randomize
