I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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