She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
should my penis look like a turkey
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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