I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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