Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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