Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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