Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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