I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
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