That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
