Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
