I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
