i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize