I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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