I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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