He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
