she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
