I think I won the penis lottery.
are you so shy because you have an std?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Randomize
