summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
