Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Randomize
