Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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