i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
