at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
