Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Randomize
