There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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