I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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