I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I don't think brook has ever known best
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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