VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Damn victory sex feels great
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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