Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
