I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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