A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
