Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
