i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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