Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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