I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
