Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
These tits shall not be calmed
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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