i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
