How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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