Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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