what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
