I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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