I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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